Returning to my old office alone felt really weird

Back in March, on what turned out to be my last day working in an office, I grabbed my keyboard and mouse but left behind four pairs of shoes and a snake plant, among other random things (laptop stand, tea, tights). I’ll be back in a few weeks, I thought. I think we all thought that. We’ll be back soon, once this pandemic business calms down. Ha.

A few days ago I returned to get my shoes and all my other scattered belongings. I hadn’t been missing my stylish work shoes since I wear one of two pairs of sneakers now, and a coworker had taken my semi-alive plant to her home already. The entire office needed to clear out because the company was permanently moving to a new location with the idea that in 2021 we would all be working there.

For the obvious health reasons, each of us had our own designated time to go in. Alone on the floor, I snooped around, feeling like an anthropologist, so far removed from where I had spent 40+ hours a week of my life. Cables and cords were scattered everywhere, there was a half-finished puzzle, mugs, a lamp, a bottle of wine. The mini-fridge was still full, the bar cart stocked. Even the random pens and papers strewn about the desks seemed significant, evidence of the Before Times.

I poked my head into conference rooms expecting…I don’t know what. They looked the same, furniture haphazard like coworkers had just finished using it. Maybe this is why I was feeling unsettled: everything looked normal. It wasn’t normal now, was it? There were no people on a floor where there used to be a hundred or more.

If I could pinpoint a moment where everything changed, that would be it, that day in early March, and this was the evidence. I remember how uncertain and freaked out I felt that Thursday night, unsure if I had to go into the office Friday. And that Friday turned out to be the first day of our remote work experiment.

I stuffed all my things into three tote bags and said good-bye to the office. I put my mask on, rode the elevator down alone, followed the signs to the new exit-only entrance, pausing for a pump of hand sanitizer. This was surreal. And also, starting to feel strangely normal now.